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Dangerous New Fad “Grohling”- Is Your Child at Risk?

Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Rockford, IL

Ginny Drum was just released from the hospital after attending a Foo Fighter’s show at Alpine Valley WI. She’s just one of many kids who have joined the ranks of the “Grohlers.” She has broken her leg on purpose in support of her favorite band.

Grohling started immediately after Dave Grohl, singer and guitarist for the band Foo Fighters, fell off the stage and broke his leg. He finished the show and is now touring with a set up that allows him to perform while sitting down.

"Where the Hell does a kid get access to an elephant?"

“Where the Hell does a kid get access to an elephant?”

“This is just plain stupidity.” Said Dr. Green. “Breaking your leg on purpose just to show you love your band. What ever happened to tattooing the band name on your neck?”

Ginny has no regrets. “So I had my sister break my leg with a ball bat. So what? It’s my leg, and it’s my band.”

Hundreds of Foo Fighters fans are showing up daily on social media. Fans are trying to one-up each other on how to break their legs. One teen was killed after being trampled to death by an elephant while trying to film the “Most bad Ass Grohling Ever”

“Where the hell does a kid get access to an elephant?” Sobbed the mother.

The “Foo Limp” has become a staple at Foo Fighters’ concerts. The handicapped area has been enlarged in many of the venues to accommodate the Grohlers.

“It’s a hell of a price to pay to get great seats! But it’s totally worth it” explained a rabid fan. “I crushed my leg in a vice. If that’s not hard-core you can kiss my ass. Foos Rules!”

The Center for Idiotic Fads, or the CIF, released a statement warning parents. John King, spokesman for the CIF had this to say to parents, “Be on the lookout for Foo Fighter merchandise, plaster, sharpies, and crutches hidden in your child’s room. They may be planning on Grohling themselves or a friend.”

“If you find these signs, sit your child down and explain to them the dangers of Grohling and the limp it can cause. Grohling isn’t funny, it’s debilitating.

It's my life. It's my leg. Nothing my parents can do about it."

It’s my life. It’s my leg. Nothing my parents can do about it.”

“It’s not gonna stop me” said teen fan Billy Rogers “It’s my life, it’s my leg and it’s my limp. It’s who I am. Dave Grohl is the greatest and I think parents should just cool their heels. Kids are gonna keep breaking their legs whether their parents want them to or not.”
The lanky teen then placed his right leg on a tree stump and smashed a sledgehammer down onto his leg while his friend filmed it with his phone and laughing hysterically as Rogers writhed on the ground. Between the tears and screams he would yell “Foo!!!!”

“Do me next!” said the friend.

Dave Grohl is outraged. “Wow. I can’t believe they are doing this.”

Grohling

“Son of a Bitch that hurt. But it was TOTALLY worth it! Dave Rules”

In order to curb the trend, you can now reserve a replica leg casts to wear to the Foo Fighters show. These are provided free of charge.

“We’re doing our best by trying to educate the public, parents, and teachers, about alternatives to leg breaking. These casts will give you the look of being handicapped without the pain and possibly a lifelong limp.” Explained the CIF.

“While it won’t stop all the Grohling, if we stop just one fan, it’ll be worth it. Maybe kids will think twice. We have convinced major retailers of construction equipment like Home Depot and Menards to quit carrying Sledge and ballpeen hammers. It’s just a waiting game now.”


 

We Are The Grohl. The Foo Fighters for Africa

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4 thoughts on “Dangerous New Fad “Grohling”- Is Your Child at Risk?

  1. I’m seeing Dave and I’m assuming the rest of the foos in August. I’m excited about this trend. Lawd knows I could use the handicapped parking access. I’m going to break it in a big way…maybe not elephant big but more like giraffe big maybe.

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    • I would suggest jumping out of a swing repeatedly. And remember just because you’re grohling is not a guarantee that Dave will sign your cast. You may end up with only a drumstick or something.

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  2. What kids won’t do to be cool. I remember causing permanent hearing damage to myself trying to be more like Pete Townshend. I accidentally lost the whole ear, so hey, as an extra plus I also got to be like Vincent Van Gogh. A twofer !!!!! ROCK ON

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